Once upon a time, there was a tiny baby, born to unusual circumstances. She grew into a little girl who thought that Life was Good.
Then Life turned on her and showed her its vicious side. It didn’t mean to, but was irrevocably altered by the experiences of those who went before the girl, and had no choice, no chance, but to take her and break her and try to destroy her. She escaped into books and into her own mind.
But the girl had a secret, a heavenly Father, who in her darkest hours would not let her embark too far along the road to self-destruction, and she hated Him for it, but gradually, the struggles of life were challenged and vanquished as she discovered a talent for writing. Unsure at first, and uncertain, but buoyed by people who cared, she practiced and honed and gradually began to emerge from her shell.
She grew up and worked hard and somewhere, the writing got lost once things were back to ‘normal’ (whatever that was) and she wished and prayed for someone to come and make her life complete. She thought deeply about things and grew into her roles as good friend, good aunty, good sister, without really realising how important it was to be a good SELF *to* herself first and foremost.
She found a someone, but unfortunately they turned out to be a million times the wrong someone, and they were nearly parted by death at their own hands after a series of disasters (which would have shaken the most stable couple in the world) turned them on each other, and on themselves.
Throughout those years of hell, she had enjoyed the love and support of friends both online and off, who helped her to understand that she could use her hurts to help – the taboos she faced, the unique position she was in, the struggles she’d encountered – could all be used for good and to connect with others who faced similar issues, and to give something back.
So she (metaphorically speaking) put on her finest armour, picked up her pen and began to write. She wrote to fight ignorance and engender compassion. She wrote to break taboo and engage the unknowing. She wrote to share her story and lend comfort to those who walked her path. She took daring steps to acknowledge the deep-seated and long-hidden fact she had rainbows at her centre, and eventually came out publicly as gay, with her family’s support and love, and was delighted to receive only love and encouragement from her friends.
These days she’s mostly a mess and a mixture, living as happily as possible, writing poetry, and whatever else takes her fancy. She is long-distance-looked-after and encouraged by her utterly marvellous BlogWife, and her darling 1000Mile Heart. She’s gradually beginning to think about the rest of life.
For now she is content to flirt a little, to hold impossible crushes, to wish she could fix the world with writing, and to hope that she and her Precious will retire as little old book ladies together, so that neither ever has to end up alone.
She tries to focus on the Good, and take everyone with her in realising that (in a way) experience is what we make it; that life can be lived in Silver Linings, that Love Wins, that people are stronger together, and are likely infinitely better if they can muster the courage to #BeReal and show compassion to one another.
She still thinks life is mostly, on the whole, Good, but that each of us can embetter it for ourselves and each other.
She is the Considerer; a bit of a tomboy princess, a committed glitterbomber, and a total goofball. Her soul, distilled in pixels and sent to you through the magic of the Blogosphere, is yours to read. Enjoy.
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. – Romans 5: 3-5
Hi Lizzi, I’m the Managing Editor at The Fictional Café and I wanted to contact you about your powerful poems we published on our site in 2018 being included in our anthology book. Sorry, I couldn’t find an email address for you. I’m mike@fictionalcafe.com thanks!
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Hello Lizzi!
My name’s Derek. I’m a student and I recently read your blog at Scary Mommy about experiencing a miscarriage. I appreciated your genuine depth and sincerity on such a difficult tragedy. My prayers go out to you.
Currently, I’m writing a short film called The Fort. It’s a psychological thriller/drama about a couple experiencing a late miscarriage. I was wondering if I could get your feedback on the script? I’d love your emotional insight.
Email me if you’re interested!
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Hi Derek. Thanks for your kind comment and your offer. I will decline as I didn’t experience a late miscarriage, and found my early ones very traumatic. I have moved on in my life now and this isn’t a chapter I wish to revisit. I hope you find someone who can give you the feedback your work needs, and good luck with it.
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Lizzie, my accomplished and inspirational friend. You…you slay me! Ive read this many months ago and even then I had to acknowledge in you I had discovered one of those secret passages to Truth all writers seek. If I could, would bequeath my eyes for a brief spell so that you might see yourself as I do: such radiance of personality and ethos. My ears so that you might hear the angels who whisper enlightenment in my ears as they read your words aloud in my mind. My mouth, that you might understand in my wry smile how deeply and to the core of my being your writing soothes my heart. My heart so that you might experience the exaltation and rapid beating of kinship I feel for you, my colleague and friend.
’nuff said. Except I love you.
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Awwwh thank you so much. I do wish I could see myself the way my friends do…but I’m working on it. Promise xo
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💗💗💗
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I found you through Ivy’s blog–wow, you have a phenomenal story. If not for our wonderful, faithful, loving Heavenly Father, I wouldn’t be here today–He’s the friend who will never let us down. May He bless you most abundantly.
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Hi Musette, and thanks for finding me! I’m so glad you’re still here, and that you have a beautiful faith which keeps you going 🙂
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Yes! 🙂
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Something good is coming your way tomorrow. 😉
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*MUAH* Thank you ❤
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You are amazing. Just in case you were wondering. 🙂
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Oh! Bless your boots for saying so! Thank you. I’m all smiley now 😀
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How is it that I have never visited your About page before? You are one bright, shining star in this sometimes dark world. Love you. xo
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I don’t know, lovely, but it’s all here waiting to be read. I’m not sure how many people have seen it recently. But thank you so much for your lovely words and your friendship ❤
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Awesome.
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Thank you so much ❤
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Best. About. Page. EVER.
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Awh thank you so much Jen ❤
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I just love you!
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Thank you Val 🙂 ❤
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Heartbreaking and hopeful. I do hope all the good things happen and I’m sure, with all the people you have in your life…online and off…that you will most assuredly not end up alone.
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No. That’s one of my big fears – as an extrovert I really really struggle with being alone, and as just me, I know that I end up with horrible abandonment/rejection issues (which is why I’m often so wiggy in friendships, and why it takes me so long to feel safe). Thanks for thinking it will work out ok 🙂
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the new about page is awesome! 🙂
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Thank you so so much. It really did need updating but I was too sad to do it.
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Oh, Bezzie. You break my heart.
Well done on coming out the other side, and I’m honoured that you consider me to have played a part in that.
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DEFFO! I couldn’t have done most of it without you – the trying OR the leaving – and I wouldn’t ever have wanted to. You’re for keeps.
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Hi. I know you have lots of challenges IRL right now! But if you have a few spare minutes, here’s a little something for you 🙂 http://wp.me/p4DMGO-s2
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Thank you! I shall go and look (and also thanks for bringing me here – I keep forgetting to update this page! ew!)
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Lizzie, I do not know how to respond. You are brave and courageous and loving and forgiving. Thank you for sharing your story. It is a story of love and hope.
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I wish that this was the end of the story, Sheila – hope – but alas it has recently ended. Hope. Marriage. All gone. And so I need a new story to weave together more pain and new freedom.
I’m not ready yet though.
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I have been so toughed by this community.
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I hit the send button too soon accidentally. I am sorry for your loss but amazed by your strength and will to press on. You are an inspiration. I hope you realize that. Blessings.
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I don’t often feel like one, but I’m so glad when in spite of my best efforts to either live right or self-sabotage or make huge mistakes, that somehow, someone else is able to take a smidgen of either solidarity or inspiration or a strengthening of their own resolve – it’s why I write so openly about these things. Thank you for reminding me 🙂
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Those who make the most difference often feel like they are making no difference at all.
Thanks for all you do.
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Thank you 🙂
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