I’m gonna do it, for the distraction if nothing else. The week has still been a week, and good things happened in spite of the really awful. So there’s that.
I mostly just still feel…numbish. But there have been times when I’ve laughed, and some were even caught on camera. Another rollercoaster week here inside my little brain, but nonetheless, there were silver linings around the edges of the grey clouds, and the sunshine prettied up the rain and made it less awful, less solid, and somehow gave me hope that somehow I’ll get through this; somehow I’ll cope.
And in the meantime the thing I can be absolutely assured of – I have my Village, and in it, no shortage of care, support or love. And thank goodness for it – I am held together and surrounded by people who, for a variety of wonderful reasons, are willing to offer their friendship and encouragement to me, and I am A MILLION thankful for them.
There was an afternoon out with my vloggy friend, which you can watch here:
There was a day off work, in which Niece and Neff were hugged and snuggled and delighted in. Eggs were hidden and found and eaten, and the sun shone and there were beautiful, gorgeous flowers to take photos of. There was a street to be ridden by a boy on his bike, and a willing aunty to run up and down to his designated points, between which he would deign to ride.
There was this:
There was THE RELEASE DAY FOR ORDER OF SEVEN, and it was SUCH A FUN, EXCITING, WONDERFUL DAY! And congrats to all who won signed copies, or whose In Real copies have already arrived. You lucky, lucky things.
There were workdays in which I worked, and didn’t completely louse it up. Okay that’s kind of a backwards, lame kind of thankful, but I HAVE been glad for the distraction and the need to continue being the consummate professional for each patient, thereby removing my time to dwell particularly much.
I’ve been kind and gentle and nurturing to myself, and on the evenings (most of them) when instead of going boxing, I’ve ground to a halt and had to sleep because emotions are turning me into an incredibly sleepy sleepything, and I’ve just let it go, and SLEPT. Which is probably good for me.
I spent three hours on WhatsApp to some of my favourite people in the world on Thursday evening, once I got up from my nap, and it was gorgeous and perfect and lovely and SO free and beautiful and just…nourishing for the soul.
The pressure is off, and Husby and I are getting along better. Not great, but better. OH, and I now officially know I’m not pregnant, because there was literally the tiniest chance in the entire world, but ohmigosh if there had ever been a NOT GOOD TIME TO BE PREGNANT, this is surely it. So *PHEW*!
I got a glitterbomb from Erin, on the perfect day when I needed it and was feeling all sad and low, and it was gorgeous and cheered me up and made me smile.
The sun shone today and I happened across a magic daisy again. I like the magic daisies – they make me smile. I needed to smile.
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