SisterWives: The Saboteur

Today, lovelies, I’m not here.

I mean, I *am* here, but not…because I’ve written a piece which introduces me to the wonderful crowd who are starting to show interest in The SisterWives project. The reason for the project’s existence is thoroughly good and I’m thrilled to be part of its inception and forward movement, but that means it’s my turn to introduce myself. Kinda, because I wrote a summary in my profile there, and gradually want to begin sharing the good, the bad, the ugly, and all the in-betweens of my life, in the hopes that someone, somewhere will find solidarity or hope in my determination to live life in silver linings.

It’s a good ethos. Does it make it easier? No. It’s a vulnerable thing to write like this – to be open and honest and raw about the things which have been going on for me; which have impacted me through my life; which are impacting me now.

And this is a new crowd, too – you guys know me (except you new people, in which case I’ll clue you in – I’m a writer who’s very much of the “Here’s a piece of my soul – please like me!” variety) and I know you’re lovely to me. You respond in ways which support and encourage me, and I’m ever so grateful for that. But this new crowd…I have no idea how I’ll be received. No. Idea. Which is kind of stressful, but the kind where you feel like you’re about to go on an adventure and need to pack protective gear ‘just in case’.

But if it helps one person…it’s worth it.

Come and see – The Saboteur

Husby Anxiety2(Be gentle)

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19 thoughts on “SisterWives: The Saboteur

  1. About two weeks ago, I walked into work and sat down at my desk. I was flooded by an overwhelming need to escape. I could not do it. I felt I was literally going to run screaming from the building. I could not sit still in my life for one moment longer. I excused myself by taking an emergency sick day and drove myself home. Flat on my back on the couch, in a dark living room (shades and curtains drawn), I knew what was happening – this time. The depression had arrived and landed on me like an asteroid as it had so many times before. The difference for me this time was I was not afraid of it because I knew that no matter how heavy and how dark, it would pass as it had so many times before.
    What I did start to think about, for the first time, is how it would effect the people in my life. How could I show my daughter her mother authentically but not suck her into the darkness? How would I explain this to someone when I start dating? (Well, as soon as I find someone I want to date, although dating stinks but I am not really prepared to be the Cat Lady.) If I live to be 100, will I still wrestle with the darkness even then? What remedy is best, worst, proven, natural, etc., etc., etc. And I kept looking for clues on what triggered it. It is like being an a relationship with an angry person and trying to make sure you don’t set them off.
    It would be nice to have some of those answers but somehow knowing others have the same questions make me feel like I can continue to manage walking towards the light.
    Thank you for sharing your story with us. ~Many thanks, Denitra Letrice

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m sorry to hear you got caught, Denitra – it really does sneak up on us sometimes – out of the blue is so right, for the way it can suddenly flood in and suck you under. I assume you’re on the other side now, and I’m so glad.

      I think the questions you were asking, though – they might be ways to combat it – because you’re using love and care and compassion (especially with regard to your daughter) to actively think AGAINST it.

      I’m not sure there’s always a trigger, though. Sometimes it just is what it is – which is ALWAYS sucky.

      Keep walking – the light is there, and it is wonderful. Keep good people around you.

      Like

    • Hurry thee over and read – it’s a collective which kind of happened out of nowhere (much like the TToT) of a group of us whose car-crash history of life reads like a horror story, but we’re determined to use the hurts to help and find the silver linings…all that.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Hey! I like Squishy better than Kitty!!! Ask the tan babe over there if I can switch with her!! She looks like a Kitty! She’s not squishy! I AM!!! You should see my ever-growing-older rolls!! You can SQUEEZE THEM with a good handful of SQUISH!

    Okay. I’m off to read. And if I stay Kitty, fine then. Prr… 😉

    Like

    • *shakes head indulgently* Noooo Kitty, you are my kitty because of tigers and peanut butter crackers and cocoa and snowball fights and never *really* meaning to make you cry.

      And the tan babe is my Squishy because she is mine and she shall be my Squishy. She has a heart so big and wonderful it even rivals yours.

      No backsies, no trading. And I get to decide :p

      Like

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