Ten Things of Thankful #55

It’s been a week of some extraordinarily wonderful Thankfuls, so much so that my head is spinning and I can barely think of an appropriate way to introduce this without my words tumbling over themselves in their eagerness to get out and reach your eyes, so that your mind understands what my heart is trying to tell you…

…it’s been a VERY good week. For lots of reasons.

WordflowerMy Very Good Week began on Saturday night, when I unexpectedly played host to my best-friend-in-the-world. There was a Situation, and I got a phonecall late at night asking if she could stay. She can always stay. She’s my Person and my Soulie (new term for me – I’m trying it on – whaddya think?) and also she can ALWAYS stay. There was raucous laughter, Pride and Prejudice (the PROPER one, made by the BBC – NOT THE FILM VERSION (which doesn’t deserve to share the name (NO! I haven’t watched it! (nor will you ever induce me to)))), alcohol, and more sugar than you could shake a stick at. The next day there was a delicious, lazy, three hour brunch, followed by an impromptu ride on a motor-trike whose owner she befriended.

My Very Good Week continued on Monday when I received an INCREDIBLE email notifying me of a tweet notifying me that my post On Isolation and Infertility had been Freshly Pressed. WOW! I have to say, the response I received to that post even before it got all pimped across WP was hugely wonderful and very encouraging. But since then I have had some amazing, often absolutely heartbreaking comments And through and through, it just reconfirms to me that the reason I write so openly and so honestly is because it matters, and sometimes the right person reads what I wrote, and takes away from it just the thing they needed to hear.

Such is the power of words. I have been both honoured and humbled by the number of people who’ve seen fit to write to me as a result of that post, and it is just *amazing* that my words have been able to make a real difference.

The sun shone for most of the week, and it was beautiful and warm and all things lovely (in spite of smashing my phone screen at the beginning of a bike ride I went on, and the bike’s gear cable at the end! pfft!). I even managed to write a meditation on rain without being brought low. That said, it began raining earlier this evening and is set to rain for a few days, but ya know what? I’m the SAME PERSON in the rain as I am in the sun, and I am *determined* not to let it bring me down. Not tonight, Josephine! Tonight I played netball and laughed and spent time in the company of an incredible group of friends.

Rainly Not So BadOh, oh, OH….AND my ‘gang’ got added to – I’ve inherited a new kid to ‘Aunty’, and I couldn’t be more thrilled. He’s a ‘Murican kid, who can karate and hip-hop like nobody’s business, and he is completely awesome. So YIPPEE! I also got to see one of my English kids tonight, who came in, begged to see the tarantula and then wanted to know all about the hair dye I’m going to use to turn a chunk of his blond noggin BRIGHTPINK when he finishes school for summer. We’re both very excited.

Yesterday I also reconnected with Niece and Neff, who I haven’t seen in what felt like forever. I didn’t have ages with them, as I was due to go out for dinner with Husby (Bike ride and Burritos – pretty epic date, rounded off with gelato and a stroll through the parks, where I found a secret rose garden, and we stopped and watched for-real cricketers for a while) but I got my quota of hugs and gorgeousness topped up a bit, which needed doing. We chatted and played football and I sat with them while they ate their tea. We did handstands and hugs and held hands and went around the garden looking at flowers, and just spent lovely, low-key moments together.

And then this – which I’m not sure belongs on a list of Thankfuls, because it’s a Thing which has potential for the BIGGEST Thankful…but also might prove to be nothing at all – Husby had an appointment with his endocrinologist this week. He’s going to begin taking testosterone (he really needs it, so he has energy to do *anything* with any consistency) and this will be the final nail in the coffin for his fertility, but he will be healthier, so this is a GREAT thing. But also, at some point before the testosterone takes hold, there’s a different, used-the-wrong-way-to-benefit-from-a-known-side-effect drug they might try him with. The different drug might (tiny chance) restore his fertility for a short while.

1. Why are we only finding out about this now?

2. Why couldn’t they have done this in the first place?

3. Does it even matter?

4. I don’t trust it. At all. And I refuse to get excited or entertain hope, because to step back onto that rug and have it ONCE AGAIN pulled out from under us, just when everything was beginning to be settled and consistent and peaceful, we are BACK IN A PLACE OF NOT KNOWING. So I’m happy and also not happy and also confused and scared and even though I don’t want to be, I am a tiny bit excited. Which irritates me and makes me nervous.

5. Why are we only finding out about this now?

Aaaand so I guess I *am* thankful. But also quite nervous, and I don’t want to make this a big deal, so I hope that July 4th, when all the ‘Mericans are out celebrating and the hop’s nice and quiet, is a good time to unveil this new possibility. Because I think a fuss would make it worse, make it real, and make it harder to get my head around. But I am also committed to sharing the ups and downs of this painful journey of infertility. And this *could* be an ‘up’, but Husby beginning to feel better and more energetic is DEFINITELY an ‘up’ – a huge one…so I’m thankful for that.

Oh, and to end on a BRILLIANT note – today I collected my next story for Tales from the Van. And my very own sister is this week’s Guest Bard. So YIPPEEEEEE πŸ™‚

 

 

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102 thoughts on “Ten Things of Thankful #55

  1. So glad you had a great week. It’s so good for all of us to be happy in the moment and thankful for those wonderful “little” blessings — like wonderful friends and unexpected visits and new young friends to Aunty.

    I hand great plans to join in the blog this week, but life called me in other directions. But like you, I’m choosing to be thankful for the little things. xo

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    • Goodness me – what did you click to end up back here? I’m glad you’re able to be thankful for the little things, and I look forward to when the pace slows and you’re back with us πŸ™‚

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    • Thanks Kate πŸ™‚ FP was a really good thing – I hope it helped a lot of people…

      And thanks – I don’t even know when the window is, but I’ll let everyone know when I do…!

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  2. Hi Lizzi. What great developments. That’s awesome that you were featured on another blog. I get excited by that also. I had moderate challenges getting pregnant this last time and I read an Eastern Medicine based book and took liver supplements. We were about to lose hope. But now we have a 13 month old handful of a boy. Keeping you in my thoughts. I’m stoked for you~ Blessings.

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  4. I will pray the new treatment has the best possible outcome for you and your hubby. I am going to believe that God will provide and bless you in ways never imagined. Your story brings hope in love and goodness.

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  5. Congrats on being Freshly Pressed! So very exciting there – and a great piece that I know will help others.

    And what a wonderful week all told. It MUST have been good if even the rain didn’t get you down πŸ˜‰

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    • Heheh yeah that’s one way of measuring it, isn’t it πŸ˜€ I didn’t think of it that way! And thank you – the piece is still making a difference to people even a week later, and I’m SO happy about that. It feels very validating to know that people who read it are drawing comfort and solidarity from it πŸ™‚

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  6. Where do I start? Well, your new ‘Murican kid sounds fantastically phenomenal, and I love that you have someone new to love. Lucky kid, he is! Hand stands and tea…you’re such a great aunt. I bet niece and neff tell all of their friends what fun they have with Auntie Lizzi.

    I still am floored with excitement on your being Freshly Pressed. I know it’s a helluva roller coaster, and I love that you’re getting even more support. I know that so many people can relate to your struggle, and there is sometimes relief in knowing you’re not the “only one.”

    I’m not going to comment on the last part. I’m just going to tell you that I’m here supporting you, lifting you up and crossing my fingers. What I will say is that I’m glad Husby is taking the path to better health and energy and good things, and it sounds like this endocrinologist has his best interests in mind.

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    • Thanks, I appreciate it. We still have more information to learn, but I do think she’s genuinely doing her best for him, and if he’s healthier and happier, well that’s the main consideration really, at this stage. It needs to be made possible, and I’m HUGELY thankful that she listened to our concerns and ran further tests and found that treatment was necessary.

      Yes – I’ve been surrounded with mostly very positive feedback from FP, and there has been an overwhelming number of people who’ve felt the same, but most cheering are those who felt that they read something which helped them, or that they felt I had contributed to a collective effort of support and taboo-breaking on this subject.

      I don’t know *what* Niece and Neff tell others about me, in fact! That’s a scary thought. I know they call me ‘crazy Aunty Lizzi’ at home…so… πŸ˜€ My new kid is a rockstar, and I am so happy to join him into my gang. I got rescued by another one this morning, which was a HUGE relief…perfect timing on my Goddaughter’s part, and she enabled me to wear her hugs like armour. Thank goodness for her.

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  7. I love your picture on top there. It is such a happy, smiley thing to see all those beautiful words written on a beautiful flower. Especially the joy in yellow, because I have a thing about yellow and joy.

    I have been trying to get our library to bring over the real Pride and Prejudice for my daughter to watch (she has never seen it) but so far have been unsuccessful. I think I will just have to break down and buy it. Which isn’t a bad thing, really, because after seeing it once she will surely want to see it again and again.

    Sending prayers about this thing you have just found exists.

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    • Thanks always for the prayers.

      YES BUY IT! Ohhhhhh gosh, once YOU have it, you’ll want to watch it again and again, never mind Katerina! It’s SO LOVELY πŸ˜€

      And THANK YOU! I’m so glad you like the pic. It took me a shockingly long time to make, but I do LOVE using my own images and then (depending on your viewpoint) embettering them or ruining them completely. But I loved the idea of joy in the middle, and the yellow made me smile πŸ™‚

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  8. LIzzi – I’m with you. I know we need rain but I love a week full of warm weather and sunshine. And how wonderful that you have another medical avenue of treatment to pursue for your husband. Darn that medicine is not an exact science — but keeping my fingers and toes crossed. xo

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    • I often wish there could be some arrangement whereby rain happens overnight and sun happens in the day. Seems that would be perfick…

      And yes…it will be GREAT to have him back to better than he ever was before, healthwise. I’m very VERY hopeful for that. And as for the other thing…we’ll see. We’re looking at a longer term time-frame, but still, the time is there to spend. Thanks for the fingers n toes crossed πŸ™‚

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    • Yes – we’re going to work on getting Husby’s health up and together first, and see where we go from there. It seems like a pretty long shot, tbh, but it’s more of a shot than we had before, so there’s that…

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  9. How wonderful to come here and find that you’ve had a really good week to celebrate! It’s so awesome to have some like this to help balance out the not so great ones. I applaud you for being happy for pending improved health for your husband, despite the other stuff it brings. And of course I am holding up a prayer for that tiny bit of hope to catch flame.

    ” the reason I write so openly and so honestly is because it matters, and sometimes the right person reads what I wrote, and takes away from it just the thing they needed to hear.” Amen, Lizzi, you’ve got it exactly right and you are doing exactly what you have a special calling for – helping others find their way thru the maze of hurt and confusion. It isn’t easy to lay your life out in the lines of your blog as you do, and I am so proud of you for putting the energy into doing so… it IS changing lifes… you make a difference! God bless you! ❀

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    • Thanks so much Josie – that means a HUGE lot πŸ™‚ I’m grinning now, because I’ve taken flak for being so open, and was halfway through a conversation about how I wouldn’t really say a lot of this stuff to my work colleagues, but am perfectly happy for strangers to read it…yaknow, it’s quite the juxtaposition, but I do think it’s worthwhile. *phew*

      And thanks for the prayers. Tiny, tiny hope, and the main thing is definitely to get Husby’s health set back to rights, which will make a HUGE amount of positive difference to his quality of life and our marriage and oh, everything. Which will be wonderful.

      But yes – a lovely week. So nice to have one πŸ˜€

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  10. Very very very well deserved, about the FP and what a great week! F’real! Although FP makes me mad – other reasons, another time. And um, what’s wrong with me that I don’t get that auntie has a new kid? She’s fostering? OMGEEEEE to hub’s appt. Big stuff. I’m on crap internet. can you please IM me in like 4 days????

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    • Lol yes of course. Or I’ll email. We’ll be in touch anyways, somehow.

      *I’m* the aunty…I collect children (this goes onward from the theme revealed in Isolation and Infertility, where I described the gaggle of children I’ve collected both here and around the world, who I can kindasorta lay a little bit of claim to (more here, IRL, obv, but overseas, Chris’s Cass and Cade, Sandy’s Nik, and now my new boy – Samara’s son).

      I know that FP makes you mad, and I’m sorry it does – I think you explained your reasons before, and I quite understand. Thanks for being gracious about it. And YES it was a great week.

      No OMGEEEEE – tiny, tiny, *tiny* new chance MAYBE – but even that it’s maybe there is messing with my head.

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  11. WHat a bright and shiney , dare I say sparkly kinda week you had, little miss postitive pants!!!! LOVE THAT FOR YOU!!!! Thanks for keeping up on the Bards … I am sincerely gonna do my best to jump back on the wagon this week… dunno how but gonna give it a shot! I will have to put on my positively bouncy bloomers!!!

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    • I have every confidence in you, my dear – somehow there will be poetry. I have our next Guest Bard all lined up for next week. We’re receiving QUITE the variety πŸ˜€ I’m loving it.

      And thank you – it’s been rather wonderful and relaxing just to have so much niceness. I shall try to stay in that headspace (though I worry that Clark and I are co-equilibriuming, in which case I should try to even us out…)

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  12. What a beautiful, sunshiney week you’ve had, in spite of rain and losing Husby and such.
    Yes, there is always time for your Person. Always.
    It’s going to be so hard not to get excited about the fertility potential. You want to be optimistic, but you also want to be realistic, because you’ve been here before. Sending up a prayer for you, as that’s all I have to offer.

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    • Tiny, *tiny* chance, is what we have. But it’s one more tiny chance than we had before. And thank you – I will always accept prayers. Just not fuss, cos my brain…

      And yes – you of all people, I knew would KNOW this πŸ™‚

      Full of sunshine indeed. Have you seen that you’re infectious? You’ve rubbed off on Zoe… πŸ˜‰

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    • Yes – SpideyGirl’s always a bit unexpected, but we inherited her from a friend…there’s a bit of a story there, but I’m never quite sure if it constitutes an entire post…

      And thank you πŸ™‚

      Looking forward to your email πŸ˜€

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  13. I need to remember that I am the same person in the rain too. If only some people in my life would see that.
    I’m so proud of you for the press. How amazing is that? You deserve all that and more for your writing. You’re unbelievable and you truly inspire me to tap into the wrinkles in my head and roll with it.
    Good friends are hard to come by and I would love for you to pop by in the wee hours of the night. My pain specialist (who is a life guru apparently) told me that a good friend is the one you can call at 1 in the morning and they answer…and you don’t think twice about the time of night.
    I cut ties with mine last month though. Nuff said about that.
    xoxoxo

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    • I didn’t want to ‘like’ that because it ended on such a big ‘ouch!’ but I won’t ask.

      And your pain specialist is absolutely right. I know that I could call her, and she could call me at those times, and it would be FINE. If I popped by to yours in the wee hours of the night, there would be much giggling, silly conversations, and mayhaps one of those deep, important conversations of the soul which happens when time stops (somewhere after 2am) and loses meaning, and the world shrinks to the size of the room you’re in, and all that matters is the two of you and the words you share.

      I’m glad you find me inspiring as a writer. For YOU, I will recount (cos the people who were there on the day already know the humiliation I endured) that when WP first contacted me about FP, it was to also remove an EPIC TYPO from the title – ‘Islolation’ (ohhhh the foul, crippling irony) – which NOT ONE PERSON had picked up on. Until FP did… I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. So I giggled and got embarrassed. But as for you, always tap into those wrinkles and roll with them. Always.

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    • Yes – he has the testosterone gel to try now. The point is to get his health and energy levels improved, and we’re both VERY excited for that to happen πŸ™‚ Thanks as ever for the prayers.

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    • Well, it won’t – life never does. That’s the thing with hopes and expectations – they often get screwed up on the way and turn into something utterly else. But that can be okay, too. I shall just hope for ‘okay’ – it’s far safer πŸ™‚

      Glad you liked the fun πŸ™‚

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  14. It sounds like a lovely week! I hope the new intel on your husband ends up being a GOOD thing and not just a WORRISOME thing. It’s terrible to get people’s hopes up and I really do think the medical community does that all the time, although I suppose that is (kinda) their job. The bit about your niece and nephew made me a big sad — happy for you that you were able to spend the time, but sad for me because it has been soooo long since I have seen mine. Circumstances do play out, though, sometimes, and I’m hoping to be able to see the little guy soon. And congrats on FP! You have been here like, what, two minutes, and you’re already getting the top blogging award! Good for you, girl! (told you WP was the way to go!)

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    • Oh it was a beautiful week full of wonderfulness. I think the new info on Husby *will* be good, but the chance of babies is still pretty small. We chatted again today, and in fact I’m going to have to edit this, because it gives an impression of more hope than there really is.

      I’m so glad plans are in place for you to get to go and see your nephew – those dudes are the BEST and I bumped into mine again today at the shops and got a whole load more huggles. It was beautiful. I love them with all that I am.

      And yeah – it was a bit wow, but worth bearing in mind, perhaps, that I’ve been *here* for five minutes, but have been honing my blogging skills since 2012, and have well over 500 posts floating around here…so I’m not a newbie really. But thank you πŸ™‚ I do appreciate the way WP is set up to share writing, and I think this one in particular was an important one to have lots of eyes on – I got loads of comments from people who’ve been through the same things and had struggled, so it was wonderful to be able to connect and support in that way.

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  15. damn! totally forgot! (clark, how many times do I need to tell you, recognizing the thinking of another clark and referencing it in a third location is not the same as writing an ‘actual’ Comment at the persons blog1
    Good Post! enjoying reading it

    1) the one that you are referring to, not the one that you are writing on, unless it is this time

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  16. You’re all Ten things I’m thankful for, rolled up into one.

    Ooh! Tonight, I heard fireworks referred to as “sky glitter” and I thought of you. And I’m sending you glittery thoughts of hope and love and all the warm fuzzies you will have. There’s a bit of the “Arrgh, why NOW and not before” going on in my brain, too. But i’m pushing that away for now, and just staying very quietly hopeful. Shhhhhh.

    YES, you are Aunty Lizzi, you enchantress! The boy you speak of is quite taken with you! We may or may not be visiting a nearby store to pick out just the RIGHT glitter…

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    • Sky glitter? What a wonderful, beautiful idea! OHHHHhhhh Precious, I LOVE IT! πŸ˜€ I’ve never heard that term before but it’s utterly perfect πŸ˜€ And how exciting that there might be REAL glitter in my future. I promise my boy a vlog of opening πŸ™‚ There…that’s a lovely thing to be able to say, and I am quite excited now πŸ˜€

      Thank you for all the hopes and warm fuzzies – they’re always appreciated, and yes – I’m *so* with you on the “Why NOW?” front…but I guess we don’t even know at this stage…if I very secretly can say…I’m also a little concerned about timing and my trip to ‘Murica, because THEN what?! *sigh* Oh it gets complicated when you think a thing is off the table and plan around it and then it gets put back ON (maybe or maybe not) :/ :/ :/

      Yes. Quiet thoughts. But great, loud, noisy, cherishing, LOVELY ones of you, Precious πŸ˜€ ❀

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  17. What a wonderful week! I hope that the medical news turns out in your favor. Maybe it is a new treatment, and that’s why you weren’t told before? I don’t know, but whatever the reason, a glimmer of hope is exciting. (Emotionally exhausting, perhaps, but exciting.)

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    • I got the impression (perhaps wrongly) that what they’re doing is a bit experimental, and using a drug which is commonly used for something else entirely, but which is known to have this possible side-effect, and in our case, it’s the side-effect we’re hoping for. So it’s not clinically tested, but a likelihood.

      Emotionally exhausting is right, though. Seriously!

      But a lovely week nonetheless. I hope so for you, too.

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  18. Dang, what a spinning needle on the dial with 2 settings for the two drugs huh, Lizzi? I’ve had some experience with direct family (like my step mom with macular degeneration) of one, “Why are we just hearing about this (drug) now?” and “in hindsight we now know we should not have used that drug.” Her case was the latter. I share that because I sooooo get it for your honey right now!! When I get home tonight and rest my head on my pillow later I will be saying and sending thoughts, energy and prayers for what is Right and Perfect for him πŸ™‚

    Also…this popped into my head at the beginning of the post when you were talking about unexpectedly playing host. That if Phoenix and I could call you from down the street and say we were in town and could we stop by for a surprise visit! Yes, my whimsical mind is always at work! Love ya! πŸ™‚

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    • OHHHHHH! If you and Phoenix suddenly called and said you were down the street and ready to pop in and say hello, we have a park *right* opposite the house where we could play frisbee with Phoenix and watch the world go by and (almost certainly) have ice-creams. Or if Phoenix was feeling up to it (actually, he *would* be, because this is my little daydream and I’m in charge of it – Husby and I would both magically have the day off, too, when you called, ‘kay?) the four of us’d walk the few miles into town, through the common (big park) and through the secret rose gardens in the parks in town, and see the fountains and get gelato… *bliss*

      BUT thank you for all the thoughts and energy and prayers – it’s a Big Deal, potentially, and I think the thing I’m most scared of is getting my hopes up to have them smashed once again. This new news is already playing havoc with my internal world…

      I’m sorry to hear that your mom’s treatment was one which should not have been used, as it turned out. AMD ain’t no fun 😦

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    • Ahhh yes – I should see it as equilibrium πŸ™‚ Or not, because then I’ll continue to be sad about rain, when in fact it’s just weather πŸ˜‰ But lovely to have sunshine nonetheless. Best thing is, I get MORE time with Niece and Neff tomorrow, which will be delightful.

      Thanks for the prayers and wishes – they’re always welcome πŸ™‚

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  19. So glad you had a great week, Lizzi. And as for your husband’s news, I completely understand your ambivalence about how to receive it. But as your hope holder I will be clenching very tightly!

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    • Yes – okay, you’re one of the few people allowed to. Thank you…I need that.

      And YES! it was a really good week and I enjoyed having it πŸ˜€ I hope you’re well, my Dana πŸ™‚

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    • Thanks Jackie – it’s working – the rain I expected seems to have fallen overnight, and the morning is…if not *actually* sunny; I can see blue patches between the clouds πŸ™‚

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  20. Congrats for the amazing week. I am wondering if I should be jealous considering my not-so amazing week. I must say it takes courage to share your joys and sorrows on a public forum and your doing so is really an inspiration. I hope all your problems get sorted. All the best and May god be with you.

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    • The thing with Thankfulness is that it’s there if you look for it. I’ve done these in some of the worst weeks of my life, and there have STILL been Ten Things to be thankful for…I wonder what you would come up with? You might surprise yourself by discovering that your not-so amazing week has had some great moments.

      I know it’s possibly a bit distasteful to some, to have so much of my life ‘out there’, but certainly as far as infertility goes, it has been SO helpful to me to be able to read the honest truth of how others have experienced it, that this is my way of giving something back πŸ™‚ Thank you

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      • I would do it… But I am not much of a writer. More of a poet. I post my poems though! (shivankm.wordpress.com if you wanna know) And they express my feelings much better. At least for me. They help me vent out a particularly pathetic week and get back my Happy-Go-Lucky attitude. Nonetheless you are an inspiration! Please do keep posting and inspiring others! πŸ™‚

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        • Poetry I LOVE – I have a poetry blog (welltemperedbards.wordpress.com) where I write my pieces, and feature other people’s pieces, and my friend Zoe is the co-owner of the site and she also writes poetry for it. There’s something about the format of poetry which is very permissive and allows so much out, whilst saying so little, and so beautifully… πŸ™‚

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  21. Lizzi i am so happy for you about all the wonderful things you are thankful for; what a great week you had..good news on the fertility journey its always an adventure. Psst I got goose bumps reading your quiet enthusiasm (is that a word or a new oxymoron) keep the faith, breath, and keep taking those steps! πŸ™‚

    that is hysterical you call us the mericans LOL! πŸ™‚

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    • Well, most of ye I know call yourselves ‘mericans, unless you’re hardcore, in which case it’s ‘Muricans. But that didn’t look so good on the font I used, so…

      And. The week YAY. The fertility news…maybe good – I still feel rather complicated about it all.

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  22. So glad you got to spend time with your bestest friend. Soulie? Heh. I’m thinking you can find a better word.
    A bike ride and gelato sounds like a fun date, except for the losing each other part. How do you do that? :). I love, love, love that I can actually picture this, now that I’ve been to your apartment and know your neighborhood a bit!
    You know my thoughts and prayers about the new medical news. πŸ˜‰
    Keep those spirits up despite the rain! Perhaps singing “I’m singing in the rain” at the top of your lungs while it falls on your head would help? Whether you do or not, the mental image certainly helps my mood! πŸ™‚

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    • HA! It’s the kind of thing I would do, once wet, complete with a terrible attempt at tap-dancing in puddles. Just for the fun of it.

      Thanks always for all the prayers…I’m still not buying the situation though.

      And…I thought I was being clever by taking a short cut (which turned out to be a long-cut) just as a cable fell off Joe’s bike lock and he needed to stop and sort it out, so by the time I realised he wasn’t with me, I had NO idea where he was, and figured I’d just go ahead to the burrito place and he would meet me there whenever *he* got un-lost πŸ™‚

      I love that you can picture it πŸ˜€ That’s SO awesome.

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  23. No big deal being made here. Wait and see. Take what comes. But, yes, WHY ARE YOU JUST FINDING OUT ABOUT THIS?
    Oh, and hey, I am feeling a little out of touch but so super happy about all the feedback you are getting and how your wonderful writing is touching some folks who probably desperately need to hear they’re not alone.
    And, finally, I got bullied into seeing the film and totally not worth it. BBC is the ONLY version because of some truly wonderful casting and loyalty to the finest lines of dialogue. Mr. Bennett was perfect.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Mr Bennett was perfect. MRS Bennett was perfect. Lady Catherine De Bourgh was perfect. Duckface was…well, Duckface *giggles* and I would rather have to round things off by saying that yes, Mr Darcy was *perfect*. I’m so glad you said the film version isn’t worth it, because it now means I can take the word of someone who HAS seen it, and now I need never bother.

      Don’t feel out of touch! Why do you feel out of touch? Talk to me…

      And I have NO FREAKIN IDEA *headdesk* Not a big deal, but also a big, BIG huge deal *sigh*

      Like

      • Yes, huge deal.
        Well, wanted to make sure I hadn’t said something wrong or done something wrong. It’s probably actually me being so out of touch this spring.
        I like that you call her Duckface. My brother always does, too. What IS that poor actress’ name?

        Like

        • She played Duckface in Four Weddings and a Funeral. I have no idea of her actual name. I should imagine people shout ‘Duckface’ at her in the street.

          You’ve done nothing wrong. Promise!

          Blech to the deal :/

          Like

            • LOL well *I* don’t know, DO I?!?! I suspect many ‘Muricans would’t have a clue. And I JUST REMEMBERED – her name is Anna Chancellor. I think most people would call her Duckface because everyone knows who they mean when they call her that.

              Like

  24. Lizzi, I am just stopping in after having had family over for the fourth before hoping to catch some fireworks tonight. But so happy I did and got all my fingers and toes crossed that this is it for you both and that this drug will indeed help you finally get that little baby you so deserve and are worthy of. I won’t be on much this weekend, as I have family from out of town in also for my great-aunt’s 90th birthday, but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you. Hugs again my friend!!! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    • Worthiness and fertility don’t go together. Not with me, not with anyone. Ever. But thanks, I appreciate the thoughts and the hugs. It sounds as though you’re having a gorgeous celebration and I hope you really enjoy the rest of your weekend. A 90th birthday should be a hoot πŸ™‚

      Like

    • I know, and thank you so much for your support, Dani – it means a lot to me. I’ll keep everyone updated, for the sake of being transparent, and because I’ve convinced myself that sharing the WHOLE truth about this infertility thing is somehow important to more than just me. So I will write. And at some point if I am hoist by my own petard, so be it.

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  25. That explains why you were up and happy at four in the morning! πŸ™‚
    I hated Jennifer Ehle. :/ Can we still be friends?
    Burritos and gelato sounds aaamazing…was that a secret or a public garden? πŸ˜›
    (I will quietly hope for you. Hugs.)
    ❀

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m often up til 4 in the morning on weekends. Which morning are you talking about? πŸ˜€ there are so many mornings…
      We can still be friends as long as you swoon over Mr Darcy diving into the lake πŸ™‚
      It was a good date (apart from we each managed to get separately lost on our bikes. And this is a place we KNOW the route to. And got lost within 500 yards of… (for real)) and the secret garden was public but unknown to me, so it felt like a secret πŸ™‚

      (thanks)

      Like

  26. I love you, your family, your struggles and everything Yuit share with us!! You are such an incredible human being that anything you mention, good, bad or indifferent, can’t help but move us, your loyal followers to attention!! I hope and pray to any diety you care to mention, that everything will work out!!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Lol I don’t know whether to blush or run away from such a deluge of praise! I guarantee that if I got *anyone* else I know IRL to write about me, you’d learn a WHOLE other story. Just always remember I’m edited in my own favour here πŸ™‚ But thanks for the hopes and prayers πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

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