EnJoy this

Yes, there’s the wonderful Ten Twelve Things wrap-up/review of 2013 still going, and it’s a beautiful thing you should definitely join in with.

BUT! There’s also this – wonderful TToT co-host Joy (from our European contingent) is hosting her own, rather beautiful, interview-style wrap up, so pop on over (WAIIIIIT – read this first ) and take part if you fancy a slightly different way of looking back.

Joy @ i can say mama: 2013 Wrap up

Gained or lost weight?
Lost. Lots. Because in April I hit my all-time high and was pretty repulsed by pictures of myself. And by myself generally. I started dieting using the 5:2 fasting diet (it’s an integrated lifestyle diet so I don’t have to think too much about counting calories or numbers of carbs or grams of portion or anything…much easier – just fast for two non-consecutive days per week and eat a small but healthy evening meal on those days. Try to eat healthy otherwise. And don’t stress). I started walking, then I started jogging, then I really went for it and began running a few times a week and ended up joining a running group! I’ve lost over 50lb, I can run almost 10 miles without stopping, and still have a small way to go on the weight loss, but I feel SO MUCH BETTER for having my hip-bones back! It’s unreal how much happier I am being slimmer – and I don’t even care if I get called out for it again – there truly is nothing which tastes as good as being in shape feels.

Predominant feeling in 2013?
Grief (with a sub-set of depression, panic and mental chaos)

Predominant feeling for 2014?
Even now I can’t bring myself to say hope…but I so want to…

Something you did for the first time in 2013?

Something you did again in 2013 after a long pause?
Worked. Because I’d been at college for two years, and then completed my course and had to find something, fast! Which I did. Though it didn’t begin fast, which gave me a nice summer off.

Something you unfortunately did not do in 2013?
Have any babies. Not live ones.

Word of the year?
Probably a sweary one, if we’re going for frequency of use…

City of the year?
I have never sat for so long thinking about the answer to a question I still don’t have the answer to. No idea.

Hair longer or shorter?
Longer. Can’t be bothered getting it cut. Husby prefers it longer, and it’s warmer for winter.

More or less money spent?
Less. Far less. Because for the longest time we were on low-to-no income and were it not for the wonderful financial support by my family, would have been homeless at least twice through not being able to make rent or pay bills. *sigh*

Highest mobile phone bill?
As of this week (new phone, yo!) it’s going to be £26.90 a month for the next two years. Which is a lot, and I’m a very lucky girl to be confident that we’ll afford it. And still not sure I deserve that amount spent on me.
I’m still coming out of ‘poverty mode’.

Hospital stays?
Fortunately not this year.

Fallen In love?
All the time – about 17 times a week!

(Wait, what, you mean with one person? Or one at a time? Uh…no…not *quite* how I do things…)

Alright, properly, yes. I am in love. With one person. The One person (probably, I hope (I hope I hope…)) who I’ve vowed to spend the rest of my life with. So there’s that. And he’s also turning back into the person who I fell for. Which is much better.

Most called person?
Probably my Dad. I don’t ‘do’ phonecalls. I text. Maybe. More likely you text me and I get it in the morning when I check my phone. I might reply.

Whom did you spend the most beautiful time with?
Niece and Neff. Forsure.

What did you spend most of your time with?
*looks around* That’d be my laptop, my blanket, my sofa, my cushions and my cup-of-tea mug…

Song of the year?

Book of the year?
Is it too shameless to plug the one I wrote for? With a bunch of other, utterly incredible, talented, beautiful women, grieving their lost children and trying to offer some hope to those who have trodden this awful path of grief and loss.

TV show/movie of the year?
Dowton Abbey. I LOVE IT.

Insight of the year?
Thankfulness is an absolute GAMECHANGER. And people need it. I need it.

Three things you totally could have done without?
Clinically depressed Husby
Miscarrying for the second time
Having to face infertility.

Most beautiful event?
There is one, shining moment of beauty in my year, which (looking back) far outstrips all the others.

Tired hands – flung lightly around my neck, body slumped heavily against mine, heart slow,  breath puffing gently on my neck as Niece’s eyes scrunch to remain shut while I remove her from the car, then relax as her head lolls comfortably on my shoulder, barely registering as I find a space to sit in the sun and watch fountains and ducks as she slumbers. Her skin smells of sweetness and suncream and her flyaway hair tickles me as a breeze wafts it astray; she sleeps so deeply that even my insistence on covering every reachable part of her face with kisses doesn’t disturb her. Later these little hands suddenly contract, stretch and reach for me, pushing her upright as she looks around, confused, then cling as I explain that it’s okay – we’ve arrived.

You can see more beautiful moments here, in my wrap-up of my summer holiday away, but this one in particular, is so vivid I can still feel it. Still smell it. Still feel the warmth of the sun on my skin and the weight of her sleeping body on my lap. Still hear the ridiculous quacking of the ducks as they clustered around my feet, utterly unaware that above their heads, perfection was happening…

More short-sighted or more far-sighted than 2013? 
In terms of my prescription; no change. In terms of my perspective; I think more far-sighted. I hope so, anyway.

The most dangerous thing you did?
Driving tired. Now I’m gonna get in trouble!

The most expensive thing you bought?Shoes. These shoes.

The most delicious meal or food you ate?
Nothing stands out. Probably good bread and butter (and if I’m fair, probably cheese and fruit) in the company of my Bezzie Friend In The World. The company is FAR more important than the food in making a meal a delicious one.

The best party?
All the Wakefield Doctrine video chats. They count, right? I’ve met SO MANY wonderful people there, and I’m so happy to be part of them.

And no, not any IRL parties this year – not because I didn’t go to any, but because when I did, I mostly ended the night drunk and crying (again).

The most important thing you wanted to convince somebody of?
I really, really wanted to convince my bloggy friends to become co-hosts with me on the Ten Things of Thankful. Hey – it worked a TREAT 😀

The most beautiful present you gave to somebody?
But also I’d say there’s a case to be made for a number of glitterbomb Christmas cards I sent…

The most beautiful present that somebody gave you?
Husby gave me this (the sister to the above)

The most beautiful sentence someone said to you?
“I want to be Little Olds with you”

The most beautiful sentence you said to someone? 
“I want to be Little Olds with you, too”

And then the reply from him – “We’ll get there…”

How will you celebrate New Year’s Eve?
We’ll be at the family home with Mum and WonderAunty and a DearFriendFromForever, eating Delicious Nibbles, Watching New Year’s Eve TV, possibly Playing Scrabble, Probably Tweeting, Maybe Texting (or maybe not), and watching the London fireworks at midnight on telly, before all going to bed (likely tipsy). Husby and I will be snuggled in sleeping bags on cushions in front of the dying embers of the fire. Beautiful.

What will you have for dinner?
Small Things On Plates. Biscuits, nuts, cheeses, vegetables, fruits, cold meats…that kind of thing.

What drinks will be in your glasses to clink?
Cup of teas. There may be wine. I may not partake.

Will you ignite any fireworks? No. We’ll just watch them. We don’t have a particular New Year’s Eve tradition other than spending time together.

What are you going to wear? Comfy or glamorous?
Comfy forsure. Perhaps even the Tigger onesie (if I can figure out how to get the wine stains out…)

Did you have any resolutions for 2013? And how about 2014?
I did. Ish. I think (did I blog them? I can’t be bothered to look – they were probably about weight loss. Or I may have had a tantrum and said I wasn’t doing any, so I couldn’t fail any.) Anyway, I lost weight and got fitter and did them under my own steam, so yay me. I also got published and won 4th place in a local short story competition. So yay me for that, too.

I think my resolution for 2014 will be to Keep Being Thankful.

What are your wishes for the new year?

  • For Husby’s health to continue to improve
  • To not fall irreparably apart in February when that medication change finally happens
  • To continue saving for my Bloggy Tour Of The USA
  • For a baby; so, so much I can’t even begin to say, and feel I shouldn’t because it’s beginning to be too much of a ‘thing’, my wishing this, as though I’m not satisfied with what I have now, and that this is a sign of malcontent and I should learn to be more grateful and fulfilled by the blessings I already have in life – but oh, I want so very much for this to be something which happens…

In one word: 2013 was…


42 thoughts on “EnJoy this

  1. Now that you're back in the Blogosphere, I hope to hear more about what made your 2013 so big 🙂 All the best to you for 2014. Hope it's an amazing year full of happiness for you 🙂


  2. It really was! I hope that for both of us, 2014 goes more in alignment with our hopes and dreams than the frustrations and challenges of the last year. Our celebration was lovely. I really enjoyed it, thanks – I hope you enjoyed yours.

    Happy New Year 🙂


  3. Your year sure was full of ups and downs. I hope for 2014 to be more calm, and full of happiness and fulfilled dreams for you and your husband. I hope you enjoyed your New Year's celebration, about the same we did here 🙂 Happy New Year to you!!


  4. Yes – I decided to finally respond to feedback and give the people what they wanted – more responsiveness and as-good-to-better stackability of comments.

    You can say it, and it makes me happier than it needs to. I worked hard for them. And I'm still working hard. And one of my big motivators this summer was a photograph of me at a wedding, wearing a 'fat dress' and straining at the seams of it…miserable! And gross. In both senses of the word.

    I confess. Joy's questions threw me a coupla times, so I hedged my bets and answered both ways.

    Blogs are a simply WONDERFUL way of getting to know someone, and I'm glad you've enjoyed it here. I'm looking forward to reading your wrap-up 🙂

    And you too – may 2014 bring you wonder and happiness in large measures.


  5. Whoa. Comments look different.
    This is a great post, Lizzi. Can I say I'm jealous of your 50 pounds? I ditched 15, completely unintentionally, but still. I would like it to be 50 right now because I just saw pictures of myself from Sister's wedding. OMG and bleah. How I hate photos!
    I love what you did with Joy's questions – great answers. I definitely think I misinterpreted at least two of them and so now I have to go look at mine again. It's been great getting to know you via your blog and TToT hops, etc. these last couple of months!
    I wish you nothing but the best in the new year!


  6. love LOVE love this. Enjoyed every word. You magnificent you.
    Also, so freaking excited about disquis! This means I will know when you've responded to me without having to come back and look! Yipppppeeeee!
    Also, 50 lbs??? Holy shit! I had no idea you lost that much. Congrats! Wow. I'm impressed with your sticktoitness. The diet and exercise both. Takes a lot,. Kudos.


  7. The group sounds really good. I've been thinking about starting something like that locally, but need to get past February before I have the headspace to do anything. I hope you like the book. The FB page (linked in the post) has links to amazon, or you can just search for it there.

    I'll come over – would you like to post the URL here, so that it's easy for me and anyone else to join you?


  8. I have enjoyed your posts because i relate on so many levels with you as I am sure you have seen in my comments. I want to get your book as I have joined a group of women who have lost children as well. I will pass it on to them. I do not want to intrude on your post by promoting my memoir, but in this case, I think it is o k – as you too, will relate and enjoy and cry and laugh with me — Battered Hope ( launched this past summer)


  9. Holy cow! I had no idea you were now up to 50 lbs lost! I think i may need to join your weight-losing club. Everything I have tried hasn't worked. I know you had a tough year but there were definitely so many accomplishments too! You have a lot to be proud of!


  10. *grins* Goody. And thank you so much for commenting to let me know! Somewhere in my past history (no idea where now, so don't ask me, and also don't try to figure out why the search function on my blog is sooooo appalling) I have a beautiful post about being a comment box whore.

    Also, if you're interested to see HOW much, check out the 'Considerings Around The Internet' tab up there *points to top of page* and see the piece I did for Urban Moo Cow on the Seedy Underbelly of Blogging 😉


  11. Which it DOES, thankyouverymuch, and I'd be grateful if you stopped the passive/aggressive whining because something changed without your say-so 😛

    (I had the interruptions *specifically* in mind when I agreed to Disqus because I KNOW IT DOES IT WELL)


  12. well if it doesn't let me interrupt a perfectly nice Comment thread, then it needs to go!
    one of the things I like is that I get to barge into the conversations of others…without the risk of getting my face slapped or otherwise physically restrained!


  13. *bangs head against wall*

    I don't think it matters that you're on
    Facebook to make it work. I think (I hope) that it offers a plethora of
    options which will FINALLY begin to make the comment system here a bit
    more user-friendly!

    I think I'm going to come back later and see if it's still all okay…


    If you need me, I shall be somewhere in a corner, in my Tigger onesie, rocking…


  14. *phew* Well as long as you made it work somehow! You had me worried there! Ouf! This thing has given me *so* much stress today! BUT I am glad it now provides opportunities for commenting (and associated fuckups) than were hitherto on offer! I shall draw a line under this week (comment wise) and call it 'teething problems'.

    But thanks for coming over, and for being so nice about my post 😀


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