The week began on a massive low, as it was this week in which my firstborn would have been due, had I not miscarried in November. Since that time, I’ve been grieving and healing and attempting in my own, small way, to contribute to a collective effort to break down the barriers surrounding this subject and de-taboo-ize it. So many people go through the heartbreak of losing a child in pregnancy, yet (in my experience, and as shared with me by others) it’s only when you go through it yourself that people come out of the woodwork and reveal their own losses.
I just don’t understand why this is so hush-hush and why so many people have felt they’ve had to go through the process and the grieving, alone, not letting anyone know what’s happened, as though by doing so, they’d be admitting a weakness.
It baffles me.
Off my soapbox and into gentler waters – literally. I’ve been super-excited about getting a fish-tank this week.
I’ve had the tank for a while, but never the money to accessorise and run it. In closing my business, I reaped the reward and got back the money which had been tabbed for tax (though when you earn as far under the taxable limit as I have done, it’s purely a paranoid precaution).
Enter a trip to a local store, one hour of delightful browsing and one (surprisingly expensive though I should have seen it coming) transaction later, I was good to go, and spent a delicious end of the afternoon (or, if you’re Sheldon, ‘prevening’) with a friend, rinsing sand, playing with gadgets and trying to plant little sprigs of carpeting plants in appropriate areas.
Then that moment when we realised that the cables wouldn’t reach the extension plugged into the socket on the other side of the room. That was a thinker.
Fortunately, Husby was on the ball. Problem solved, tank plugged, and voila!
You’re quite right – there are no fish in that tank.
For anyone who’s bought fish (and had a good salesperson) or for anyone who knows about fish, this will make sense.
For anyone who’s not au fait with the subject, when you first set up a fish tank, the system needs to be left to mature for 1-2 weeks so that all the helpful bacteria can get colonised and are able to manage the water quality and the filtration of ammonia. In developing this lovely status quo, there will be both a nitrogen and ammonia spike at some point within the first week or so, which would likely kill (or at the very least, highly stress) any fish put into the tank too soon.
But for those who’re interested, here are the fish I hope to have within the month
Gold Ring Danios (3-4cm) – a shoaling fish, a bit more unusual than the more common zebra danio, and (like all danios) absolutely bulletproof, so a great first fish.
Cherry barbs (3-4cm) – another shoaling fish, small, pretty and bright (though they can be bullies, so don’t put them in with any long-finned or long-barbelled fish)
Corydoras (5-6cm) – yet another shoaling fish, but this time bottom-dwelling, these sweet little catfish will help keep the muck off the sand and will add interest to the bottom of the tank
Fan shrimp (8-9cm) – a big, solitary bad-ass, but awesome to boot. He’ll hang out under the bogwood and around the rocks, waving his hands to remove edible particles from the water (helps with filtration, yo!)
I took part for the first time in the Yeah Write weekly challenge, and it was absolutely fascinating. I thought that I would be completely obvious as the newbie in the gang, but the writing really varied (of course, it’s all opinion-based-judgement, as the entrants vote for their five favourites of the other entries) and it was a great experience.
The chosen ultimate winner was Le Willow Wimp, who is a recent add to my blogroll, whose writing I find deeply profound and wonderfully descriptive and evocative in a way I’ve rarely come across, and who I am very pleased to be getting to know.
This here weekend here might just be the start of summer in Britain! It’s meant to hit 24C tomorrow, so YAY for at long last seeing some large, blue skies and that shiny hot thing up there.
I am discovering more and more that I *adore* the conversations which can be had in the comment boxes of blogs. This week I learned that I am ignorant about the parts of language (verbs, nouns, pronouns, past-participles etc) and that each time I think I’m smart, someone smarter comes along and puts me (nicely, as a rule) in my place.
I also have learned that comments from good friends will provide a wealth of information, support and suggestion for how to combat some of the puzzles I find in life.
I also don’t know how to make sure a comment box shows up on my friend’s blog, which is a pity, as they’re wonderful things.
It’s open all weekend, so you can join us on either day and start taking part in the wonderful conversations we have. Happy weekend to you.