I have a confession to make – this year, in the midst of all that has been going on lately – I nearly forgot about my wedding anniversary.
And you didn’t help, either – you only sent me a notification this morning (complete with pretty, pink heart emoticon) that ‘Anniversary with Joe today’ is happening. Well shucks – thanks for the heads up!
As recently as the weekend, people have asked whether we’re ‘doing anything Wednesday’ and I’ve casually told them “No, don’t think so – why?” and been puzzled at the shocked look on their faces. Apparently I have committed some form of cardinal sin in forgetting (with so little sign of shame) that the date is significant.
Nonetheless, with in-laws visiting, combats with mental health on many fronts and with various loved ones and the ongoing grieving/acceptance process of the loss of two children and the prospect of never having more, the marking of our wedding anniversary seems to have slipped, faded into the background and become unimportant (in a way).
You may have noticed though, that this morning came with an update – yes, Facebook – we celebrated in style over breakfast by cracking open the Twinings Tea (and for two people used to the Sainsbury’s or Lidl value brands, this is *quite* the occasion) and shared a lovely cuppa while reminiscing about what we’d been doing at that’o’clock three years ago…
The day itself, that relatively short time ago, was lovely.
It was the culmination of months of effort on many people’s parts, notably WonderAunty, who bore my occasional Bridezilla-ness with an attitude of calm practicality and was able to calm me down, make suggestions and find ways forward where I’d hit a brick wall.
Husby and I, on the other hand, went variously to pieces – falling out over the wedding dance (to the point that, two nights before, we nearly chucked it all in) because he can’t find a rhythm in music and I don’t let him lead, but not wanting to miss the opportunity of having a ‘first dance’ and forever regretting it; panicking about being late (me) or falling out with siblings over a tie (him).
[A pause so I can share our wedding song with you – we did dance in the end, and well, according to onlookers – thank you Sam Cooke]
I recall distinctly (Facebook, you might too – I expect I posted about it at the time, thinking it was such the original thought) agreeing with Husby that neither of us wanted this day to be ‘The Best Day of Our Lives’ because that would inherently mean it was all downhill from there, and this allowed us to be somewhat forgiving of situations which didn’t go entirely to plan and allowed a (marginally) lesser level of panic.
In the end our wedding went as smoothly as clockwork. I was ready on time, arrived on time, got married on time and (most importantly according to the two of us) the reception ended on time (thus preventing the Irish wedding tradition of drinking til the wee hours which may otherwise have ensued), and we were firmly and (I hope) irretrievably wed.
I have some fond memories of the day
- Seeing Husby looking proud and nervous in his gorgeous suit
- Husby and I pulling our first ‘Newly Married’ tongue-pokey-out faces in the doorway of the church while sensible photos were being called for
- Tripping over my own dress while trying to manouevre for photographs (and realising that no-one had noticed and I’d gotten away with it)
- Sneaking away to a room away from all the crowds to have a plateful of lunch with just Husby and I and no People!
- Our cake, which was 3 teir, white and coated in pick’n’mix sweets with a spray of sweets on top. The table was also strewn with the remainder of (about 3kg) pick’n’mix the cake decorators hadn’t used and we threw handfuls of sweets at our guests after we’d cut the cake.
- My going away outfit, which was gorgeous and had shoes which utterly crippled me in under half an hour
- Returning home from the wedding reception to take shoes off, put feet up and watch Come Dine With Me, nursing a cup of tea together on the sofa
- Trying to change our status from ‘Single’ to ‘Married’ on Facebook and realising it would take 24 hours to alter
- Eating at a Mexican restaurant, still giddy at the change in relationship status
- Our first night together…
Facebook, you have been with us from the off, and it’s been wonderful to appraise our friends-and-relations of the status of our relationship via your updates.
It’s been great to hear from people long distant that they’re thinking of us, praying for us and otherwise encouraging and supporting us via your functions.
But Facebook, when it comes to letting me know it’s my wedding anniversary when I’ve got a lot on, could you give me, say, a week’s notice? It would help an awful lot and prevent me from committing social hari-kiri in quite such a spectacular way…
Thanks, though, for being there and documenting our journey.
|Yes it looks a little weird – it’s a photo of a photo because I’m too much the troglodyte to have a digi image to hand…|
(Fittingly) The Final Two Weeks of Ten Things of Thankful
1. Husby and the way our relationship has evolved and grown stronger over the last three years.
2. Tonight’s meal (with accompanying parents-in-law) to celebrate
3. The lovely array of cards and best wishes we’ve had from friends-and-relations
4. The weather, which continues while not to be summery per se, has witheld on the downpour front for some time now.
5. For a lovely shower this morning which somehow inspired two blog posts which will be present in the near future
6. For the Ten Things of Thankful which has been rather a blessing and has really encouraged me to make the effort each day to find some good, and even on the days where that has been difficult, good has been found.
7. For a friend of Husby’s who offered us fertilised chicken eggs, an offer I would dearly love to take him up on, but one which I think I must refuse due to the nature of the shared gardens at our flat and the restrictions imposed by the council. They’re ok with snails and a tarantula and a fish tank (coming soon) but I think chickens may be pushing the envelope a little far. It was an awesome offer though, and a dream I hold dear.
8. For being slightly starstruck at the calibre of people ‘Liking’ the Considerings Facebook page and for discovering a that one of my favourite bloggy people has ‘liked’ it (and upon discovering their presence on Facebook, worrying that it’s too stalkerish to request them as a friend, sighing and clicking away)
9. For having confirmation from my lecturer that my final pieces of work have been received, marked, and I have passed the unit (and likely the course) with flying colours.
10. For this three hour video of waves crashing beautifully onto a beach, which I have discovered makes a far superior (and less distracting) audio background to writing than music (I’ve also just discovered quite by accident that if you listen to it at the same time as the aforementioned Sam Cooke number, it’s like having a private Sam Cooke concert on a secluded beach, which is perfectly delicious)