The sheer contradictoriness of children

A week ago I posted about Niece and her perpetual surprisedness at my insistence that we walk the short distance to the shops. Today was no exception, but it did take a surreal twist later in the day.

As usual, I suggested the shops (having planned, specifically, to run out of things so that we would have to go (and, as usual, I managed to forget some of them while we were there and still need to go again (I also managed to totally forget the electricity meter key, despite having said to Niece (twice) that this was on the list of Things To Do (so poor Husby had to go and get it later and I was really happy that he’d realised I’d forgotten (again) and had got it done – what a star)))) and, as per routine, she whinged and said she wanted to go in the car, I said no, she cried (and when I say ‘cried’ I mean crocodile tears – that ‘I’m-making-a-sad-noise-in-hopes-you’ll-appease-me-but-I’m-actually-not-upset-enough-to-produce-any-tears thing they do)a little bit and then asked for a carry. Standard.

Later though, back at her house, when I suggested we visit our new flat and take some boxes round, she piped up “Are we going in your car?” I responded in the affirmative and she immediately came back with “I don’t want to go in your car!” Incredulous, I asked whether she wanted to walk, to which she nodded vigorously.

What the actual…?! I mean, is there a MANUAL out there that I don’t know about, telling small children how to be utterly contradictory and a complete wind-up no matter what? Believe me, next week when we (again) walk to the shops, she’ll be hearing about her wishes NOT to take the car. I have a sneaking suspicion that she’ll have forgotten all about it by then, though.

She also managed to operandi under the ‘contradiction in terms’ modus with Husby, who looked after her while I went to undertake a School Governor Visit. For two hours, they played, did colouring, bounced-and-jumped-on and slightly beat up her Uncle and watched cartoons. He made sure she was engaged, interested, happy, fed and watered. I came back to quiet and calm. Immediately she saw me, she clung like a limpet and made out she’d had a terrible time. Poor Husby – it couldn’t have been better and she gave him no credit at all.

The awesome thing is, though, that I know her, and I know that she would’ve done the exact same thing with me a few months ago. Despite her protestations to the contrary, their little Uncle/Niece relationship is developing beautifully.

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2 thoughts on “The sheer contradictoriness of children

  1. Ha! If we changed our minds as often and as vehemently as most little ones do, we'd be considered completely mad. Never a dulll moment when Niece comes for a visit! Glad you finally got the electricity taken care of. 🙂

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